[Originally posted by Yosh at No One Reads Your Blog, a blog collaboration by the members of the band Jake Wilkinson’s Unicycle]
I’m freakin’ out man!! I hear a low rumbling, kind of like a semi passing by on the interstate or someone a block away sitting their car listing to their music with the sub woofers blaring. The thing is, no one else can hear it. Charity said I must have a brain anurism (sp). Featuring Enchilada McKenzie said I should just shut up and turn up the Beach Boys I was listening to. The thing is the bass is UNDER the Beach Boys!!! Maybe Tag Team’s ‘Whoomp There It Is’ or the Beastie Boy’s “Brass Monkey” or the 69 Boy’s ‘Tootsie Roll’ would have the bass to cover it up, but certainly not these oldies like We Five – they recorded before bass was invented. Just kidding, they played bass guitars, but there wasn’t this sonic, studio produced bass that is most electronic and hip hop music. Remember when sub woofers first started showing up everywhere and then these guys started have bass contests at their car shows. This led to the bass tests CDs that really aren’t music, just pulsing sounds that blow out normal speakers. this is what the aliens are using on me RIGHT now. No one else can hear it because they aimed the sound waves right at my head. They are having a bass contest and they found that when they channel the sound waves through my mind, it amplifies the bass. This is because I can use my imagination to make a sub woofer that is so big it doesn’t fit well into the Grand Canyon. All i can do is let them finish the contest. I bet I don’t get anything for helping them out. Selfish bastards. Get OUTTA MY HEAD!!!!!