[Originally posted by Yosh at No One Reads Your Blog, a blog collaboration by the members of the band Jake Wilkinson’s Unicycle]
Today I was eating a carrot and I bit into the bone-ouch! How annoying that is! I think I chipped a little piece of the bone cause I spit it out. I guess I’ll go back to buying skinless boneless carrots. Even though carrot skin is OK to eat, much like chicken skin. OH!! You know what? They make bonesless chicken! I don’t know how you would do that-do you? But it would be nice. I think the life of the chicken would be hard though….well, maybe not. It might be really fun, he would be stretchy and be able to slurk under doorways and probably fit through that pesky chicken wire. Wouldn’t that be freaky to be sitting there at he kitchen table enjoying some lemonade?
…what?…..oh, I mean freaky if you all the sudden saw a hungry chicken slurk under the doorway! AHH! that scared me just thinking about it. Think about how his eyes would look, kind of like a flounder. With nothing but his skin holding him together he’d be amorphous. Well, unless he was boneless skinless chicken. Then he (I actually have been meaning she because he chickens are roosters and we don’t eat rooster…do we?) would be a pile of uncooked white chicken meat. Shoot, I forgot about the feathers. Well-PILLOWS! Gee chickens are useful. But anyway, carrots are better boneless.