A Narrow and Indefinite Path

Like a soda shaken, something in my blood cries for release. It is the passing of time that shakes that something up charging into potential energy. Sometimes I feel like all I need is to be able to talk to someone to let that pressure out, but really what I need is change.
I’m walking down a narrow – oh so narrow – pathway in slow motion (or regular motion…it’s all relative to point of view) Either way you look at it, though, everyone around me is moving at light speed. About eight years ago I started experiencing among my brothers, my sandbox playmates, that metamorphosis that all humans being pass through. It’s all at once a loss of innocence, a maturing, a rite of passage and a moving on. With our brows raised in surprise and maybe a little jealousy we watched one of our own shed his childhood skin and commit himself for a lifetime to a girl, a female, that mysterious “other” human being that we had spent so many conversations trying to figure out. Suddenly something that seemed impossible for us “kids” or maybe just too distant in the future, or something for “grown ups” was happening to one of us. But even more surprising was how quickly it came for the next guy…and then the next. Gradually I was now in the minority and as my polar ice caps of commonality quickly melted I was forced to jump to others. Oh how fast they disappear. Soon I found myself among a younger and younger crowd only to watch the same scenario happen again and again.
I have learned so much from observing them all and through all of my failed attempts. Supremely I have learned (and continue to learn) who I am and in so, the single person’s most sought after attribute(as long as he or she must remain single): contentment. But the road to true andlasting contentment is long and winding and loneliness is a beast who is constantly biting at your heels….


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